A Romantic Getaway; Fun And Romance For Adults

As an a adult, it is not unusual for love and romance, two important factors for maintaining a relationship, to fall to the wayside as you deal with everything from paying bills to working and raising children. However, it is possible to have fun in love to ensure the spark that brought the two of you together remains bright. Here are a few ideas designed to bring excitement and romance back into your relationship, regardless of what type of situation you are in.

Take a Romantic Getaway without the Kids

Even if you are on a strict budget, you can take an amazing trip. It just takes some creativity. For example, the beach offers the opportunity for fun in the sun, picturesque views, great meals, and more. In the offseason, you can usually find great deals, especially if you have time to sneak away during the week. You can go anywhere from the Outer Banks of North Carolina to Tybee Island off the coast of Georgia, California’s Catalina Island or St. Michaels, Maryland.

If you prefer stunning views of the mountains, why not book a cabin in the Great Smoky Mountains? Gatlinburg, Tennessee and Asheville, NC are great options. You can also head to the Wichita Mountains in Oklahoma or the Rocky Mountains, which run through six states and have a number of cabins to choose from. Cabins are ideal because they tend to be somewhat isolated, yet have everything you could possibly need including a Jacuzzi and/ or hot tub.

Take a Romantic Getaway with the Kids

The truth is that it can be hard to get away without the kids, but that doesn’t mean you still can’t have fun in love. More and more places are offering onsite babysitters. This can be well worth any added cost because they usually have an arsenal of age appropriate entertainment options that will keep your children happy, while you and your partner get time alone, which will keep you both happy.

If you can’t find an affordable vacation spot that offers onsite babysitting, you still have an option. Before you arrive call the place you will be staying and speak with a manager, concierge, etc. to find out if they have kids. If they do, ask if they have a babysitter they would recommend. If so, call them and see if they can sit with your children a couple of times during your stay.

If you are hoping to have some fun time without the kids while on vacation, be sure to book a family suite or a hotel with connecting rooms. If you are heading to the beach, opt for a beachfront room with a balcony. It’s the perfect place for the two of you to relax after the kids go to sleep. If you are planning a trip to the mountains, look for a place that offers in room fireplaces and/ or Jacuzzis to up the romance factor.

Don’t let the romantic spark in your relationship die out. Utilize the ideas above to ensure the flame continues to burn.

Visit at cityofeve.com for more ideas.

3 Ways To Have Animalistic Pleasure With… Your Spouse?

3_Ways_to_Have_Animalistic_Pleasure_with…_Your_Spouse_#1 copyWho is happier: the promiscuous lover, jumping from bed to bed with the frequency of a character from an ABC sitcom, or the monogamous person who only has sex with one partner?

I guess that depends what you mean by “happy.”

Believe it or not, scholars have actually researched “happiness,” specifically comparing the promiscuous to the monogamous. I talked about this a lot in my book Sex Matters.

That’s why this Psychology Today article particularly intrigued me. In this candid (and almost uncomfortable) article, Mark White, Ph.D., offers some honest insight into perceived “happiness.” He begins the article declaring, “it doesn’t take much to see that monogamy and promiscuity can each give a person happiness, albeit likely two different kinds”:

Promiscuity- thrill of the momen
Promiscuity, or “non-monogamy” as he calls it, brings “excitement of variety, the thrill of the unknown, and the pure physical bliss of sex, untethered by any emotional attachment or anxiety.”

Monogamy- longer lasting fulfillment
On the other hand, monogamy provides “a deeper, longer-lasting, and more fulfilling type of happiness that enhances any other aspects of one’s life.”

Which sounds better?

What if you didn’t have to choose?

Dr. White’s conclusion surprised me. In short, he suggested… why not get the best of both worlds and just have promiscuous thrill with your monogamous spouse? His exact words:

Of course, the ideal would be to find the more hedonic, animalistic pleasure with his or her spouse or partner instead of looking for it outside the marriage or relationship, and to a certain extent that can be done. (Psychology Today, 3/12/11)

As a person married to the same woman for close to 25 years, this made me almost stand up and cheer! I love when Biblical truth is revealed from the most unlikely sources.

So let’s look at three ways we can find animalistic pleasure with our spouses:

1) The “ideal” sex is good sex within a marriage. Note, not just sex within marriage, but good sex within marriage. Let’s be honest. Who wants boring sex? Dr. White seems to be endorsing kinky, wild, unrestrained, bed-breaking sex … all within the context of marriage. Even if you don’t agree with his wording, don’t disregard his insight. You can have hot sex in marriage.

Newsflash: It ain’t sin to have really passionate, uninhibited sex with your spouse (Tweet This!), enjoying each other to the fullest! Hot sex doesn’t require sin! Good sex doesn’t flow from porn! Bed-breaking sex doesn’t necessitate multiple partners! God designed you with all the pleasure sensors you need, just the two of you.

2) The more you lust after others, the less likely it becomes that the person lying next to you will meet your needs. Dr. White says it plainly. If the thrill of sex comes to you from that variety of the unknown, then you might be disappointed with the same ol’ thing. That’s an uncomfortable fact to think about, but I think it brings up an interesting observation: people who “look around” will only be as happy as the next big conquest. In other words, their happiness is contingent on happenings to happen. If these happenings don’t happen … no happiness. It’s a sad existence. The grass ain’t greener next door; fertilize your own lawn. (Tweet This!)

3) Monogamous relationships run the risk of becoming boring only when we stop putting effort into them. Dr. White admits the “ideal” would be to have hot sex in marriage. Then why does marital sex get such a bad rap? This stigma doesn’t reveal a design flaw in monogamy; I think it reveals our inherent selfishness and laziness. Satan loves this. He loves it when spouses are no longer creative and romantic, because when married couples stop putting effort into meeting each other’s needs… affairs become appealing. And that’s too bad.

Long story short: look to one another and you’ll discover the most satisfying sex you could ever have is with the person you’re already married to.


BSLN--Logo.pngLooking to increase the sexual satisfaction levels in your marriage? Check out the Best Sex Life Now Workshop. This 10 part video series will help you find deeper intimacy and experience better sex. If not, we will give you a full refund!

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Six Keys to Bed-Breaking Sex

Six Keys to Bed Breaking Sex - blogOne of my proudest moments in marriage was the night when my wife, Ashley, and I broke our bed while making love. Yes, you read that right: we had bed-breaking sex!

Now, the bed was really old and pretty fragile. On top of that, the bed was small and I was overweight at the time, so sheer gravity was working against the antique frame below. Still, we broke the bed during sex, and I think we can all agree, that’s pretty awesome!

I strongly believe more couples should be having “Bed-Breaking Sex.”

When you and your spouse improve your sex life, you’ll simultaneously improve your marriage. (Tweet This!) It’s as simple as that. It takes a lot more than a great sex life to build a great marriage, but it’s nearly impossible to build a great marriage without it!

As I’ve interacted with couples from all over, I’ve discovered that there seems to be an epidemic of unfulfilling sex (or sometimes no sex at all) happening in modern marriages. This tragic neglect or misunderstanding of sexuality has the potential to wreck a marriage. Don’t let that happen!

So how can you get bed-breaking sex? Every couple is different and there is rarely a “one-size-fits-all” approach to anything, but I’m convinced that these six basic principles would instantly improve the sexual fulfillment in most marriages. Give them a try! This is the kind of “homework” you’ll actually enjoy. (Tweet This!)

In addition to these six tips below, you should check out our new video series, “Best Sex Life Now,” on strengthening sex, intimacy and communication in marriage. It’s the most comprehensive resource we’ve ever had a hand in creating, and we believe this resource could revolutionize your sex life and other aspects of your marriage as well.

These first three apply BEFORE sex:

1. Make foreplay an all-day event.
Foreplay shouldn’t start thirty seconds before you plan to have intercourse (I’m talking to my fellow men out there on this one)! Find ways to flirt with each other throughout the day. Send flirtatious and/or thoughtful text messages to let your spouse know they’re on your mind. Those consistent little acts will help set the mood for romance later.

2. Tell your secrets.
One of the biggest barriers to true intimacy in marriage is a lack of trust. Your spouse needs to feel completely safe and secure with you to fully engage in sexual intimacy. Secrecy is an enemy of intimacy, so make sure you’re communicating consistently, openly, and honestly at all times. Your transparency will create trust and that trust will ultimately create better sex (and a better marriage).

3. Serve each other.
You should serve each other throughout the day so that your spouse’s mind can be freed up to enjoy the moment. Husband, this might mean washing the dishes or folding laundry. Wives, this might mean giving your husbands a back rub to help him relax. Find ways to serve each other and you’ll be building a bond of intimacy before you even get to bed.

These next three apply DURING sex:

4. Tell your spouse what you like (and what you don’t like).
Your spouse is not a mind reader. Be open and honest about what feels good and what makes you uncomfortable. Communication is vital to a mutually pleasurable experience.

5. Have fun!
If you’re not having fun while you’re having sex, then you’re doing something wrong! Bring your sense of humor. Be playful. Be adventurous. If it always feels like work, then talk to your spouse about the issues that might be holding you both back.

6. Be mentally monogamous.
Don’t bring outside “fantasy” into your bedroom. Both your body and your mind have to be fully present in the moment, so don’t allow porn or erotic romance novels to put images in your mind that will create fantasies that don’t involve your spouse. True intimacy requires monogamy (both physically and mentally).

 

best-sex-life-nowFor more ways to enhance your sexual intimacy, check out our newest workshop Best Sex Life Now with Craig and Jeanette Gross and Dave and Ashley Willis. This 10 part video series will help you better understand what great sex is really all about and how you can have that in your marriage.

Get the Best Sex Life Now!

 

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