She is no longer my sex kitten

When I first met Anna she was the perfect London escorts sexy kitten. Normally I would not get involved with London escorts I date on a personal basis, but I could not resist the temptation that was Anna. Not only had she plenty experience of escorting, but she was the first girl I had ever met who loved to be a little bit risky if you know what I mean. The one thing i like to do is I love to look at my favourite escorts website and book a girl. I had never asked any of the girls from my favorite London escorts service out on a personal date before, but I could not help myself when it came to Anna. I don’t know what happened on our first personal date but we seemed to really connect.

Anna was even wilder than the sexy kitten I booked at London escorts, and I just know that I had met the girl of my dreams. The more time I spent with Anna outside of London escorts, made me realise that I really had to make some of it. Before I knew it I had opened my big mouth and asked Anna to come and live with me. Anna was a bit anxious at first. She was not keen to leave her London escorts, but after a little bit of negotiating, she decided to come and live with me. Anna was so different from the other London escorts that I had met and never really asked for anything. As far as I could tell, under that sex kitten image lived a sweet and innocent girl. To me, at least, she was becoming more adorable day by day.

After we had been living together for a few months, I threw caution to the wind and gave Anna her own credit card. Before then I had been giving her cash but I felt that I could trust her. The first month everything was okay, but then Anna started to see her friends from London escorts again. The girls went shopping together while I was at work, and soon I noticed that all London escorts are rather good at shopping. Let me put it this way, Anna’s credit card bills skyrocket and started to worry me. I was so much in love with Anna that I decided not to say anything about her credit card bills. The last thing I wanted was to upset Anna and end up with her going back to London escorts. However, I did keep an eye on her shopping habits, and I soon noticed that she started to buy jewelry.

That really made me wonder what was going on, and I decided to look into her background. It turned out that Anna had worked for several London escorts services, had her own flat in London, and was a bit of a gold digger. My perfect little sex kitten was not exactly who she claimed to be, and it did not take me very long to realise that I was in fact being had by a very clever young lady. Being the perfect London escorts sex kitten was just her act.

Her Favorite Oxymoron

Webster’s defines oxymoron as “a combination of contradictory or incongruous words.”

Here are a few of my favorite:

Freezer burn, pretty ugly, loose tights, soft rock, numb feeling, minor crisis, only choice, growing smaller, random order, jumbo shrimp, and quite possibly the most wickedly ingenious phrase ever devised by evil marketers and foisted upon unsuspecting consumers like us: shop ‘n’ save.

I doubt you’re aware of it, but your wife has a favorite oxymoron. It’s even more intriguing to her subconscious mind than the aforementioned shop ‘n save. I talk to married women across the country and it’s abundantly clear.

The oxymoron that revs their engine most is this one: Alone together. It’s also what your marriage needs more of. Time. Just the two of you.

No kids. No distractions. No laptops. No dishes in the sink. Just the two of you.

Alone. Together.

A friend of mine vacationed in Europe with his wife this summer. Three whole weeks. Just the two of them. I saw him recently and asked, “How was your trip?” His answer is what prompted this post. His answer is what got me thinking about oxymorons and missed opportunities. He said:

“I didn’t realize it, but it’s what our marriage desperately needed. English isn’t spoken in the villages we visited, so we literally had no one else to talk to. It was like God set us up! We talked about everything. We shared everything. There was more touching, more laughing, more lovemaking, more handholding, more affection…it’s the closest we’ve been in years. Months later, we’re still enjoying the afterglow of those three weeks.”

That brings us to you.

You may not have the luxury of a three-week European vacation, but you do have 30 minutes to take your shoes off, hold her hand, and walk on the beach this weekend. You do have $20 for a few drinks at the local watering hole. You might even have $400 for a few nights out of town.

With a little initiative and effort, there’s something you can do to feed your marriage. Have you held it up to a mirror lately? It’s probably looking a little lean. And like my friend discovered, just-the-two-of-you time could be what it’s starving for.

So, when you pitch your wife with a walk on the beach, or drinks this Friday night, or even a brief jaunt out of town, remember to use her favorite oxymoron: “Wouldn’t that be fun? Just the two of us. Alone together.”

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One Way to Help Your Spouse Recover

Do you really want to know how to help your spouse the most during his or her recovery from porn addiction? Work on your own recovery.

Sounds kind of backward, doesn’t it? Well, it isn’t. In fact, it is the exact thing that you need to do at this exact moment in your life.

The more you hover over your spouse’s recovery, the more you are going to spiral out of control with them. Quite honestly, the less recovery you are going to see from them.

Time and time again I have seen spouses, including myself, get crazy involved in too many aspects of their loved one’s recovery. I have heard women talk about not wanting to leave their house to do things they enjoy because they were so afraid of what would happen once they are gone.

But the reality is, your partner will do what they want to do if you’re in the house or not. You have no control over that. You can choose when and where to set boundaries and act on them, but you have no control over what your spouse will and will not do when it comes down to it.

Helicopter monitoring only leads to hurt feelings, even less trust, and failed recovery because you are not allowing your spouse to take responsibility over their own recovery. That is why it is VITAL to focus on your own recovery while they focus on their recovery.

What does your recovery look like? Everyone’s is different, but there are a few things that we all must do.

First, come to realization that your spouse’s addiction is not because of you, is not your fault, and you have no power to change their actions. Once you start to realize that your spouse’s addiction has nothing to do with you and there is very little that you can do to force recovery, you have the freedom to start realizing God’s path for you.

Seriously, guys, I was in over my head trying to figure out why my husband was addicted to pornography. I went through all the thought processes of “maybe I am not having enough sex with him,” “maybe I need to lose weight,” “maybe I should try the stuff that he looks at.” None of those thoughts are valid. In fact, that kind of thinking only led me to believe that I had control over the situation. Which, I found I didn’t.

It did not matter if I did any of those things to appease him (or so I thought I was doing). He still chose pornography.

I continued to spiral down into depression. It wasn’t until I became aware that his addiction was a direct result of his own baggage from his own past. Not a single thing about me. But, I also knew that this addiction wasn’t good for our marriage. That is when I told him to choose our marriage and get help or choose his addiction. He got help. I got help.

Next up, finding myself again. After truly knowing that his addiction was not about me, I could do nada to force his recovery, and he was actively seeking recovery, I concluded that I lost myself. I put so many years into his addiction; from trying to be okay with it to trying to fix it that I lost sight of myself. Side note: we had three kids in between there, too, so talk about a huge hot mess of losing myself!

Where did I begin? God. Where should you begin? God.

Listen, it all needs to start with God. Trying to do anything on our own only causes disaster upon disaster. I could have gone all day frantically trying to reclaim who I once was before all of this, but instead I have allowed God to create a new person. I mean, this whole porn addiction thing changed me, A LOT. There was no reason to try to pretend it never happened. In doing so, God has worked through me and my husband in many ways to help other people through this issue.

I prayed. Allowed myself to do things for me. And prayed. Allowed God to continue working on my heart. And prayed. Allowed myself grace in the process. And prayed.

Through all those things, I have come to be where I am today: not quite “there” yet but well on my way. I have found that I love writing again, working out again, worshiping (though not great at singing!), and, the best of all, I actually enjoy being with my husband again. I want you to get there too. You are worth it.

I want to make sure you understand me here. I am in no way telling you to stand by and allow an abusive relationship to continue. I am telling you that, if your spouse is actively seeking recovery (that looks different for everyone), you should be actively recovering as well. If that is not your situation, please pray about your next step, talk to someone trusted, and then take that next step.

If your spouse is in recovery and you have not quite reached out for help, try our Recover program. It has been such a blessing for so many spouses, myself included. Recover gives you community that urges you towards a healthier you and understands all that you are going through with love and grace.

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The Way to Get Back Together With Your Ex: Angel Escorts

Is getting back your ex the one thing you think about at the moment? In that case, you seem like you went through a particularly nasty breakup. Breakups negatively impact every facet of your life. Your college life, home life, and work life all seem to lose their significance, at least for a short time. Is there a way to reunite with the ex who made your life so fulfilling before? Among the things you will need to do before answering that question is just to stop and have a breather said by the girls from Angel Escorts of https://charlotteaction.org/angel-escorts. When a terrible breakup tears your world apart, you will need the time to get over the shock of it. One thing that occurs after you break up is that you forget all the bad things and fixate on the great times you had together. Breakups have the effect of creating your ex-seem perfect, and you will do just about anything to get them back. Getting back your ex-seems like the only thing you can do to be happy. But with a little time, you will gain your objectivity, again and again, be able to see that your ex for all that they are. Everybody brings good and bad qualities into a connection, after all. In case you’ve taken some time to look at the breakup and still feel that getting back your ex is something you will need to do, then it is time to determine how to speak to your ex again said by the girls from Angel Escorts. Every individual and every situation differs, so think about what would work best for your ex. Would they rather hear from you on the telephone, by email, text message, a written letter, or a trip to their house? Consider what your ex would want from you and plan what to say. You need to be friendly and establish a fantastic conversation. There might be some hurt feelings left over from the breakup so be ready to manage these. Talk about whatever comes up gently and sensitively. Under no conditions allow your conversation to turn into a struggle! If you understand that the conversation is just going to become a session of rehashing everything that went wrong in your relationship back off and give it more time before you attempt to get in touch with your ex again. After you can both have a mature, friendly dialogue with each other, you’ll be ready to begin on the road to getting back your ex. Be honest and open with your feelings, and ask your ex if there may be a chance of being a couple again. Do not insist that they reply right now — for all you know, your calling them completely by surprise, and they might be at a complete loss for words. They’ll have to consider the things you’ve mentioned before making a choice. Just pose the question and give them space to consider it by themselves. This is the trick to getting back your ex.

Don’t Get Caught Off Guard with Their Grieving

“John” came into the counseling office looking very despondent. “I don’t understand what happened this week,” he said. “’Jane’ had been doing so well and I have not seen her angry in more than a month. Then she just exploded. Crying, throwing things, cursing at me. I thought we were good. What happened?”

“John” is a recovering pornography addict who has been in therapy for nearly one year and his wife, “Jane,” is working on her own betrayal recovery. What “John” encountered is not unusual for a couple doing the intense work to get their marriage back on track.

“Jane” was going through another bout of grieving over the betrayal she experienced from “John’s” use of pornography during their marriage. What happened with “Jane” is simply part of the recovery process. Men tend to forget the average recovery time for a woman dealing with betrayal is 12-24 months.

Over the past month, “Jane” had been practicing self-soothing herself when she was feeling angry or sad as she thought about “John’s” actions. She was trying to reduce the amount of negativity she was experiencing when spending time with her husband.

There is nothing wrong with “Jane” trying to stay more positive around “John,” her only mistake was she should have told him what she was attempting to do. This would have helped set “John’s” expectations about her recovery.

But he also made mistakes.

Enjoying the stability of a peaceful home, “John” didn’t take opportunity to ask “Jane” how she was dealing with her recovery. If he had, she most likely would have shared her emotions, instead of holding them in.

His second error was mistaking “Jane’s” calm demeanor to indicate she was no longer emotionally or mentally troubled by his pornography addiction. As I tell my male clients, while your wife may be presenting a calm and peaceful appearance do not underestimate the amount of emotional distress that still lies under the surface.

x3-fighting-for-my-marriage-facebook-10A woman’s grieving is like ocean waves. There are periods in which they are large and powerful, and they can feel overwhelming. There are other times when they are smaller and seem calm. This can give off mixed messages and lead men to have a false impression everything is back to normal.

Wrong.

First, things are never going back to normal. She doesn’t want to return to the marriage you had. For her, the marriage is tainted and dirty. She wants to take the relationship in a new direction that brings a renewed sense of hope and healing. And you need to go there with her.

Second, she is looking for the “new guy.” Recently, a wife who was struggling to re-engage with her husband after nearly a year of recovery work, put it this way, “On one hand there is my husband who cheated on me with multiple women. On the other hand, is my husband who no longer cheats on me. So, tell me, what’s the difference between them?”

It is critical a partner understands the changes being made by the man in recovery. She needs to know there is something different about him that will enable him to guard her heart and make healthy decisions. And if you don’t explain to her how the “old guy” has changed, you are leaving her in the dark.

In order not to be blindsided like “John,” take the following three steps in working with your partner:

1. At least once a week, ask your spouse how she is doing with her recovery. If she simply says “ok”, follow up by asking what has happened that she is now feeling “ok.”

2. Make it a point to check in with your partner on a regular basis and share with her what you are learning in your recovery. More importantly, communicate how the insights you are learning are helping to change you to become the “new” guy.

3. Be fully aware of the time a woman needs to heal from betrayal and understand although at times she may seem calm and peaceful under the surface could still be a great deal of fear and emotional pain.

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4 Ways To Respond To Your Spouse’s Porn Problem

As an author and speaker about the inner thoughts and feelings of men, including the visual nature of men, I get a lot of questions from my audiences, like this very common one: “I just discovered my spouse is using porn and am devastated. What should I do?

My team and I always want to have answers, but since we are social researchers and not counselors, we interviewed Michael Todd Wilson to get his take on this. Michael Todd (MT) is a licensed professional counselor and a certified sex therapist who we highly respect. He gives counsel and advice to men and women all over the country on these topics, and we wanted to tap into his wisdom for a series of articles based on our interviews with him.

What follows is professional and practical advice for the person who has discovered their spouse using porn. For simplicity, we wrote from the viewpoint of a wife discovering her husband’s porn habit, as that is the majority of cases, but the same advice would apply if the roles are reversed.

This advice also assumes the spouses in question have a personal faith in God. We know not all readers will share that personal faith, but we unapologetically believe no one can do this on their own. If you find yourself in this situation, reach out to God and see that you can rely on Him for help in all areas of life – starting with your own difficulties right now.

And that is vital because as you will see, it is essential to ask God to give you the ability to respond well before you tackle this topic with your mate, to have not only good, firm boundaries, but also a healthy dose of the grace and compassion that is so important to a good outcome.

How on earth do you do that in such a hurtful situation? Read on.


From Michael Todd Wilson:

The first – and single most important – piece of advice I have for someone who discovers their spouse is struggling with sexual integrity is to avoid the almost irresistible urge to charge towards them with confrontation and aggression.

Yes, you will be angry. But venting anger isn’t going to lead your spouse to be an appropriately broken person who’s willing to walk the difficult journey ahead. Instead, it will close them off and trigger a denial response, such as “You’re crazy, I am not looking at porn.” (Or whatever sexual integrity problem he is dealing with.)

While there is a need to grieve the loss of what you thought you had in your marriage before discovering the infidelity, it’s not going to help to believe the worst about your spouse, either.

If your husband is a Christ-follower, he knows he is not where God wants him to be. And even if he isn’t, he probably has felt guilty about his porn use; otherwise he wouldn’t have been hiding it.

No matter what, it is almost certain that, despite his actions, he deeply cares about you.

There is a very important need and opportunity right now to encourage your spouse out of the shadows of porn or any sexual infidelity, and towards the light. Which is the only way healing will come.

Encourage him to get help rather than simply demanding he get help ‘or else.’

Sharing the truth that this is unacceptable, and that you need him to seek help for change, and doing it firmly but gently, could be the catalyst God uses to redeem your husband’s behavior and protect your marriage and family.

Here are four initial steps to take:

  1. Under no circumstances should you accept any responsibility for your spouse’s actions. Reject any impulse to feel you have caused your spouse to be unfaithful. However, just as you expect him to examine himself and do some hard work in his life, this is an opportunity for you, the offended spouse, to look inside and “own” whatever difficulties in the marriage may be on your side of the relationship. For example, I see that often (not always, but often), there has been marital conflict on both sides that has led to infrequent sex or sexual problems. Which is sometimes a contributing factor to a spouse’s pain. Again, though: These may be contributing factors, but how your spouse chooses to respond to these difficulties (by hookups or porn) is fully, one hundred percent, his responsibility.
  1. Be gentle in the way you approach your spouse. I know this will be extremely difficult, but at the outset, refrain from expressions of anger and try to see that your partner is hurting on the inside, whether he admits to such pain or not. You can share those feelings of anger with your spouse at some point when it’s more beneficial. Initially though, it’s most helpful to take this anger to God and press into Him. At first, discussions about what’s happening with your husband’s porn use should be limited to your most trusted one or two friends, preferably ones who aren’t family (sharing with family now will likely have unintended, detrimental consequences on that relationship later).
  1. Accept denial as a natural response of the spouse who is caught – i.e. “That porn website in the computer history wasn’t me – that was one of the kids.” Denial goes with the problem, and you may not be able to break it yourself. Pray for God to convict him and break through the denial. I have seen over and over again that the Holy Spirit will convict your spouse much more effectively than you ever could.
  1. Don’t believe the worst in your spouse. Your spouse is actually in pain. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be doing what they are doing in the first place. (Porn use, believe it or not, is often a means of coping.) Offer empathy and encouragement to get help. If your spouse is ready, help him to take the next step to get help (such as finding a local ministry or men’s accountability group.) If not, give him space and pray until he is. It can be so hard to wait, but he truly has to be ready to get help; if he is only “getting help” because you insist, it is not likely you will see the true life change you both need.

If you feel that you have already “messed up” in how you approached your spouse initially, it’s simple enough to go back and confess. After all, this is exactly what you wish your partner would do with regard to his own sexual mess-ups. You can model the same humility in confession that you long to see from him.

So if you spewed your anger initially, you can go back and confess that, and apologize, even months later: “You know, when I first confronted you I did it in a way that caused more harm than good. I was scared, angry, hurt … I turned that into punishment. I’m really sorry.

All these steps will create a gentle but firm approach to make it easier for your spouse to move toward the light instead of running, hiding, denying or downplaying poor sexual choices.

 

Bio for Michael Todd Wilson
As a Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Sex Therapist and Board Certified Coach, MT leverages professional-grade coaching to help Christian men (especially men in Christian leadership) successfully recover and pursue sexual integrity. His specialized coaching is convenient from anywhere by phone or video conference. You can reach him at intentionalhearts.com.

 

 

 

 

 

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Some tips in getting a guy

Who does not wish to resemble or loved? Of course, everybody wants to be loved and be liked. Nevertheless, most ladies find it hard getting guys to like them. The fact is most women simply do not understand a guy’s habits. Earls Court escorts of https://charlotteaction.org/earls-court-escorts said that getting a guy like you is learning more about his behavior. It is only by understanding a man’s habits that a lady will get him to like her. Although men have different behavior, there prevail traits when it comes to being brought in to females. The tips you will learn will work for the majority of men so read thoroughly. Really, the tips are simple to follow. If in a way, the man you like is various you just have to make some modifications.

earls court escort

Do you notice how appeal pageant contestants smile? They smile a lot and they wear lovely, natural smile that will lure everyone that sees them. Smile can attract males and it helps you be friendlier. It removes that anti-social look in you. Smiling can help you be more visible to guys. If lots of men are around you it creates a challenge to every male to make a move. Have a look again at the beauty pageant contestants. Exactly what do you commonly see about their characteristics? If you want to learn how getting a guy like you works you need to discover the best ways to forecast self-confidence just as what these appeal pageant candidates do. Earls Court escorts tells that a positive woman is something that males generally search for. Females who are good at dressing up will more than likely get attraction from men. Frequently, a not so beautiful lady will get more men than someone so lovely who does not know the best ways to dress up correctly. Use hot clothes but preserve decency. Showing some skin helps a lot to get discovered by men.

Again, use charm pageant candidates as your role models. Do you see how they forecast positive mindset? You will see several pageants that have contestants who inadvertently find phase. See how they get up? They stand proud and with maintained poise. How do they do that? It is because they always preserve a favorable attitude. Earls Court escorts tells that getting a guy like you is not really a trick for numerous women understand about it. Like men, women are studying how a guy acts. Ladies are as compulsive as guys in desiring their opposite sex. Remember, exactly what counts most is your total personality. Use the tips you have just discovered and see how many men get attracted to you.

Searching for a partner online

Are you considering the idea of having a date on line? Are you worried that you might wind up fulfilling a scams? Do you would like to know ways to avoid rip-offs or phonies, which are prevalent when having a date on line? Nowadays with people living fast paced lives, even dating becomes tough to fit in everyone’s hectic schedule. Because of this circumstance many people find convenience of searching for a date on line. St Albans escorts of https://charlotteaction.org/st-albans-escorts says that the presence of different sites providing dating services has also affected the increase in popularity of this kind of dating. Nevertheless if you are planning to try this dating method, there are things that you should consider to guarantee your safety and success of discovering a partner. Here are the pointers on how you can meet the right partner through the date on line service used by various websites.

If you desire your possible partner to get a great idea about your personality then you should provide your web profile with the essential details. You should also remember that publishing genuine individual information will allow you to find a partner who will like you for who you truly are. If you are planning to go for a date on line then you should make certain that you are with a real dating website. Search for a dating website, which has an excellent feedback from its users so that you will be assured that you will not be a victim of a scam. When you have a genuine website to discover a match for you then you are on the right track in finding your future partner. St Albans escorts said that prior to you join any dating site, you need to be clear regarding exactly what relationship and partner you are looking for. This will give you an idea of what you are anticipating from the dating service that the site provides and will assist you to have a sensible expectation.

When you have actually discovered someone who matches your criteria, you should not satisfy the individual immediately. St Albans escorts tells that you must offer sufficient time to understand more about the person. It will likewise let you understand if the person is truly severe in pursuing a relationship with you. As soon as you sign up with a website that offers a date on line type of service, you must not expect that you will find the perfect match for you quickly. You can satisfy various people who possess the qualities you are looking for however it does not indicate that they are already the one destined for you. It might take at some point before discovering your true partner but you need to not lose hope. In discovering a partner who will belong of your life you must have a clear understanding of your goals. You ought to also understand the different issues that people experience like website frauds and scams identities. When you are knowledgeable about these things then you will have a safe and effective result.

Free Video Series and Private FB Group – Available Now

We have some pretty exciting news for you.

Here’s the thing, we have a lot of resources for individuals and couples who are struggling with porn use.

Some of these cost money because they fund the development of new resources and initiatives.

But at the end of the day, we want to help as many people as possible…

So when I can announce that we have a new free resource that I think is going to help a lot of men and women I GET EXCITED.

Here is what we have available right NOW and I think you are going to love it.

 

First, for the men struggling with porn and stuff. We have:

 

1. A free 3 part video series called “3 Things to Tell Your Wife About Your Pornography Habit.”

I know the idea of sharing your struggle with your wife might seem pretty scary. But it’s what we need to do and these videos will help you with that process.

2. A free private Facebook Group for men only.

In this group, you will be able to access the video series I just told you about plus share with and hear from 1,000’s of other men all on the same journey as you. Plus, we have leaders and staff in this group who will be jumping in and offering encouragement and advice.

 

Second, for the women married or involved with the men who struggle with porn and these types of things we have:

 

1. A free 3 part video series called “3 Ways to Help Your Husband Kick His Pornography Habit.”

Yes, it’s his problem. But, it’s also yours because it impacts you and your marriage. You probably already know this but at times feel helpless because you don’t know what to do or how to help him. These videos will give you some clear guidance and help.

2. A free private Facebook Group for women only.

In this group, you will be able to access the video series I just told you about plus share with and hear from 1,000’s of other women all in the same situation as you. Plus, we have leaders and staff in this group who will be jumping in and offering encouragement and advice.
Sound good?

I hope so.

So here’s what you need to do to learn more about these free videos and get access to the private groups.

1. Click HERE.

2. Request Access.

3. Wait for your Private Invitation code to arrive in your email.

That’s it. Let us know what you think.

 

 

 

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One-Sided​ ​Conversations​

In my marriage, I volunteered to do lots of things that I never did. Not in a timely fashion, at least.

HER: “We need to make an appointment with our tax guy.”
ME: “I’ll call him this week.”

HER: “One of our sprinkler heads is broken, and the grass in our front yard is turning brown.”
ME: “No problem. I’ll replace it this weekend.”

HER: “Can you help me upload the photos on my camera to the cloud? I can’t figure it out.”
ME: “Sure. Just leave your camera on my dresser and I’ll take care of it for you.”

If you’ve been married more than a month, you know what’s coming next.
The question.

Oh, it might not come for a week or two, but it’s coming.

“Did you call our tax guy?”
“Did you fix the sprinkler?”
“Can I have my camera back?”

Far too often, instead of owning it like a man, I stuttered and stammered my way into deeper
doo-doo.

“Uhhh, let me think … tax guy … did I make that call? Hmmm. I remember I was going to. Oh
wait, that’s right, I was about to call him and set up our appointment when I got called into a
meeting. Crap! I’ll do it this week.”

“This week?! It should have been done months ago. Why didn’t you call him last week like you
said you would?! Aauuugh!”

“I didn’t have time.”

[Sound of my parachute not opening]

Here’s what “I didn’t have time” really means and what every frustrated woman hears in that
moment:

x3-fighting-for-my-marriage-facebook-10“I don’t really care that you lose sleep at night worrying about our taxes. I don’t really care that our front yard is ugly and embarrasses you. I don’t really care that you’re stressed out and fearful we might lose the family photos from our summer vacation. What matters to you doesn’t matter to me. You don’t matter to me. I have lots of priorities, but you’re not one of them. There are important people in my life, but you’re not one of them. You’re practically last in line!”

Instead, when you volunteer to do something, write it down. Schedule it. Prioritize it.

Prioritize HER.

That’s always what this is about.

Better yet, anticipate her needs and take charge. From “Better Sex Guarantee #1” (Chapter 5 of
my book, Wife Magnet):

“Intimate and lasting marriages are forged when we anticipate the day-to-day needs of our
wives and spring into action before we’re asked.”

YOU: “I saw tax forms on your desk the other day, and I know how much you hate it when we
fall behind. I called our accountant this morning. Our appointment is next Tuesday at 4:00 PM.
Is there anything else we need for that meeting? Bank statements? W-2’s?”

YOU: “I keep meaning to fix that broken sprinkler head, but weekends have been so busy since
Little League started. It’s my only time with the boys. The good news is I found a handyman who
can do it this Saturday for only $50. I know you’re tired of our front yard looking so ugly.”

YOU: “You were having trouble uploading photos from your camera, right? I went ahead and
created a new Dropbox folder called ‘Summer Vacation 2017’ and uploaded all those great
pictures you took. I also changed the settings on your camera, so whenever you connect it to
your laptop, any new photos will upload automatically to the cloud. You’ll never have to worry
about losing photos ever again! I tested it and it works great. I can show you right now if you
have a minute.”

I’m guessing, but you might need more than a minute. Especially if her laptop is in the bedroom.
Trust me, you’ll learn to LOVE these one-sided conversations.

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